Thank you Malcom X .
I don't always draw at my desk, as a matter of fact the 'first sketch' seem to come more lately in my 'chair'. My little comfort zone in the living room (my other work area) complete with tools and portable drawing board, ready to create! I usually end up there when tired but not to tired to think and never too tired to draw!
I read the quote and started to doodle.. I knew in my head the idea I wanted to get across. The "every heart break" hit me. I think when we say 'Heart break' - we think of LOVE, relationships that do not work. Before I knew it, I looked down at my paper, I see I drew another kind of heart break.
I became emotional, when I realized what I had drawn. Me
I even had the staples on the head. Heart break does not just come when we lose someone we love, (including pets) from death or a bad relationship.
Anytime anything is close to our heart, something we feel passionate about, is threatened, harmed even just disappointed.. our hearts can feel broken.
Every LOSS. That, I believe is the hardest to overcome.
It breaks my heart when I hear about someone that is suffering, sick and has to FIGHT, defend and WORRY about what makes them feel better.
Then... I hear or read that they die.
People who I have met, become friends with, no longer stories just in the news.
They die fighting for what they believe in.
Yes, technically it is cancer, HIV or some other terrible disease that kills them - but they die fighting for Cannabis - because they understand how it helps ease their pain! A plant.
I have wondered sometimes, If I'd be better without the added stress that Cannabis has introduced at times into our lives... but, that only happens when some BULLSHIT starts, with changing rules and sending people to jail for GARDENING.
Everyday I see my son. I know he is sore but he is functioning, working and keeps busy - all because of Cannabis. A plant. My stress with Cannabis I will embrace for this reason alone. It suddenly becomes a very small stress, when I do not have to worry about my son in pain or getting side effects from long term 'man made' pain medications. That adversity makes me say: BRING IT!
Then the new twist. My head. I woke up this morning in pain. I usually do. My head. Same spot. I lay there and felt heart broken. I started to get teary - oh no... no- it's going to be a long day. I forced myself up. Went into my office and loaded my bong. *I know some of you find this hard to believe (friends and family perhaps that do not use or fully understand) but, I had that puff, went and sat down and within 3 minutes the pain was gone. My twitch slowed. I got up made my son some breakfast, had a laugh at his new 'Pet Robin' and got to work. I have no doubt in my mind and from past experience, without Cannabis I'd still be in bed feeling sorry for myself and crying and in pain.
God works in mysterious ways. I won't pretend I'm always thrilled or understand, but the other quote that keeps coming to mind:
If he leads you to it - He will bring you through it.
He is. With His plant.