...

Last night I had a small panic attack... at the thought of not having any medicine.
I am running low and must 'ration'. 
When & IF the new changes take effect we will no longer be in control of our medication we put into our bodies. The strains that best help our conditions might not be available - and it’s been a while for me to find them in particular for what eases my twitch.  We will ACCORDING to Health Canada have to pay much more, another stress to me as my husband is pretty much the sole income earner since I became ill. We will have to worry about so much more it is insane.  The company my husband works for does not have any benefits, and because we ‘own’ our own home (and worked hard to do so) I cannot apply for disability or even a trillium grant for medication - I found this out a few years ago when my Dr. wanted me to try a new, expensive, arthritis medication. We are the average Canadian family. Well.. about the bills anyhow. ;)
I am NOT complaining, merely pointing out facts that many are not aware of. 
I feel BLESSED we've made it this far, especially when sitting at my desk.
 ;-) Like so many others we live week to week... because ‘shit happens’.

I am pretty much botox free. I like feeling my face even the pain sometimes is better than the constant numb feeling, loss of eye control, unable to smile,  drooling, feeling pain elsewhere etc... Did I tell you OHIP will NOT cover my botox injections!? Even thought they are CLEARLY NOT for cosmetic reasons..  - thank you,  Health Canada for making me sicker every day.
 That being said when I have an attack, you see it. 
I am having a hard time with it. 
So are others.  Oh well.

 I have to now worry not only about our son not having his medicine *which he has taken since the age of 14 and has been nothing short of ‘miraculous’ with helping his pain- I have to worry about the one thing that is helping  keep me together. 
The thought of NOT having it and dealing with this had me in tears. 

I am so AFRAID to put any chemicals into my body with what is going on in my brain 
- will I be forced to? If I can’t afford Cannabis? I know a few who said they will have to switch back to OXYKiller  because they can get them so much cheaper for pain. 
BTW MORE people abuse OXY prescriptions than abuse Cannabis. Don't believe me? RESEARCH IT! 

So  yes, I try very hard to stay positive, draw positive and continue to bring awareness but I do get angry and last night all I could think was:

FU*K you Health Canada! You are messing with peoples minds because you did not handle anything correctly from the start and Now you want to PUNISH US ALL??

I am really starting to believe that it was a set up all along, for Steven Harper to now be able to start to fill his private prisons. I think Steven Harper should be charged with war crimes against sick Canadians. 
It is a war. 
A drug war, one that many truly suffering, sick people have been DRAGGED into battle. Literally a fight for their life. 

Health Canada better be ready for the POLITICAL, nightmare of a storm they are bringing upon themselves. I’ve yet to meet anyone who does not fight back when backed into a corner, fighting for what they believe is their life.
Let alone a Human Rights violation.
The rest of the world will look at Harper with disgust 
- like they already seem to do - only now they will see JUST how LOW he can go.  

Why would they want us using Cannabis that we could grow ourselves when they can make a profit and solve the problem of the sick, by forcing us to take pharmaceutical drugs (extermination on a grand scale when you look at the annual death rates from prescribed medications) and putting us in prison. FACT.

Thank God for Puppies who take regular naps, chase booms & glooms away during the course of the day. <3 I can not resist to snuggle, so I too am napping more. 
xox <><