Let me start by saying today was a fantastic morning when I woke up! Naturally, slowly like most normal people.. Not being zapped awake by this intense internal alarm clock.
Jolts. My jolts are increasing & very visual. You can see them in photos, to be 'witnessing' them is another story - let's just say Poppy never seems to be an issue any longer. Please do not judge people with service dogs - IF the dog is behaving - why not mind your business? Well Behaved pets. should be permitted to assist their owners if needed.
I don't know how to explain other than- I constantly feel electrically prodded.
To put it mildly. A smile will set 'it' off as easily as a frown, 'riding them out' seems easier when smiling, so I try. ;) I't's become more frequent & Brain surgery must be discussed. It's hard to - again. Already it has me in a 'frenzy' and I apologize for it. Several times a day I wonder for a few seconds - will I survive this - it's changed my thinking.. when people say: it will happen in five years - my brain clicks - '5 years? Who has 5 years?' It just does. I must accept this.
I'll be trying to educate as I've researched, it's more common in women over 50 and becoming more frequent! Are you reading? I hope so.
No PILLS! & NONE FOR YOUR children unless as a LAST Resource.
I have tried to push my own son away lately so he does not have to witness this happening to his mom all the time. I intentionally PUSH people away. Fear helps me.
Storm is luring me already with a 'Bird Kingdom' visit in the near future! He was showing me photos this morning! Then he said: they jolt them to make them fly for you - for your photos..." and he grinned. lol They do NOT! Fake news. "we'll call and find out when few kids will be there" he reassures me. ;) Its too distracting other wise..
This blog has people fooled. Or does it? I've thought I've been pretty open & honest.
If you don't follow faithfully, I guess you might think I was o.k.. Thankfully, Storm installed a program for me that checks as you type everything or I would STOP - It's too frustrating.
People Judge. I can paint, chill laugh hang out with a few in real life & in my imagination.
Norm and I are getting a divorce, as soon as the Universe allows.
We NO longer seem to be able to even interact at all. The sooner the better- I need to take more time for SERIOUS house hunting. IF I can find a place and leave before I need to have 'anything done', thats the plan. I'm also hoping to attend Spannabis in Milan in October. I told Josh I'll meet him there with my sketchbook.
E MAIL No e mail for a while... I won't be communicating.
Several of you - ( I believe you know who you are - feel free to contact me to say "Hi"
Other than that... Sorry, (theres that Canadian thing) I won't set in motion any conversations for a bit. All e mail is read.
Focus. Do good along the way. Make others smile even if you cannot.
Things become lost in translation with e mail anyway.
I must do what I feel necessary day to day as life presents itself.
back to business tomorrow.. & the new company- UCCC...
'My saving Grace' at the moment in many ways. I thank God for it.
Look at the photo I was sent this morning! Every time I look at it I BURST into SMILE!