NightBitch... wow.
The other night I stumbled on the movie NightBitch, I knew nothing about it but saw the cover & I like Amy Adams, a woman and dogs- how bad can it be? It was bad, in the sense - it hit a nerve and had me remembering & angry, still. I highly recommend it to men & women before you have kids and especially after. I don't want to spoil it for anyone not seen it yet but it's about a mom with a baby, toddler and life at this time and it is spot on, too accurate for comfort for too many, no doubts. Why do you think they made the movie - it is a common occurrence, too many can relate to.
Before I continue I want to stress, Storm was the best gift ever given by God & I am grateful for him... but because of Norm, there are too many memories I would rather of not had/have. This movie shows how difficult it is, how much women GIVE and how little we get in return, how little appreciation or consideration. Perhaps long ago it took a village to raise a child but the village is gone & most women, like it or not raise the children on their own - with a husband.
I'm going to share a few 'memories'... I am often accused of living in the past - by someone who wishes I would forget the past - I guess so... but I've learned, when we forget or don't acknowledge the past it tends to repeat itself & child rearing is no different. Storm was an 'emergency breech C-section' (up and down incision), when I came home from having him, two weeks passed and I had to drive myself to emergency because my C- section had opened to a gaping hole 2 inches big- the ER Dr., was angry and stressed - "YOU are doing too much!" I was told to go home and tell my husband to 'step up!'. Norm was not cooking, cleaning or anything - it was if his life never changed at all.
Not long after , I guess Storm was a few months - I was exhausted and needed a break - Norm took Storm for the day to the mall with friends. I packed up all he needed and off they went. When they returned - 6 hours later, Storm was acting strange... I looked through the bag and everything I had sent - food, drink, snacks - NOT one thing had been touched! Norm though had purchased and ate lunch with our friends. Storm on the other hand was starving, wet and exhausted. I was furious! My friend Kathy (& neighbour) that went to the mall with her baby & husband (born days apart from Storm) was so upset, she cried and apologized - she assumed Norm was feeding him. How fucked up is that? How selfish to not give your baby any consideration to feed or change him for 7 hours? So, I never let him take Storm again (until he could speak), go figure.
The first time Norm was asked to look after Storm for the day - he was resentful - "why not get a baby sitter?" God forbid he look after his own child for the day & I even made it easy, food, toys, suggestions were provided. I headed down to the city to my cousins baby shower. Storm was not yet 2.. I think he was about 14 months (still not speaking). When I arrived back home - Storm was in bed (his crib) and I thought that was a bit strange as he was normally active at that time- I went up to see him and he was unresponsive! Usually, he was thrilled to see him momma! He was like a rag doll - literally, I started to freak out, I could not even shake him awake! Norm was still outside playing ball hockey'.. I screamed and asked him what is wrong with Storm - "He was sleepy, I put him down.." it was then I saw the open & empty tube of *'Baby Oragel'.. I asked him about it and he said he had it but he took it off of him & that was that. I called 911 and they said get him to the hospital A.S.A.P. - OFF I went (by myself) I wasn't waiting for an ambulance - Storm was rushed in, still unresponsive and had his stomach pumped -right away, It was difficult to watch (a painful memory) I was in the room & shoved a tube down his nose and pumped charcoal into him. Hours later we returned home and Norm was still playing ball hockey, he did not even come and see how Storm was - I called him over and slapped him so hard in the face, his glasses flew off. So, I never let him 'baby sit' again.
It never ends.. One day I asked him for help so I could fold the growing mountain of laundry which Norm was incapable of doing, he begrudgingly took Storm and said: "Come on Storm, Mommy doesn't love you anymore!!" Those words still burn my ears to this day - simply because, I had asked for some help.
I did it. I taught Storm everything - Norm did NOTHING. I taught him how to speak (which was delayed due to hearing loss) Norm was too impatient. I took him everywhere, I raised Storm by myself. Fact. There's more.. so much more but - what's the point of rehashing everything, & there's too much to mention & yes it still and always will make my blood boil.
When Storm was around 14 our fridge broke, Storm and Norm were looking on-line for a new one and I made the mistake of piping in - "I like that one!" Norm turned and gave me a disgusted look (in front of Storm ) and said:
" You have no say, you have contributed nothing to this marriage."
I kid you not. That is what he thought of me after almost 2 decades. I contributed nothing to the marriage. Because I was not bringing home a pay check - I contributed nothing - WOW. Has he lived that one down? NEVER. Why should I forget? I wish, I was like the mom in the movie and had the strength to leave him then because you know what... unlike the movies ending when the child is still a little toddler, it continues. 3 decades + later- Norm still has '0 appreciation for me. Looking back, I did him a favour, unable to trust him alone with our child, I was forced to do it all on my own- I would never have any fun anyway, if I left Norm with Storm - I always terrified of what might happen in his own fathers "care". Like the time Storm broke his wrist and Norm did not believe him & would not take him to the ER, Storm had to call me to come home (I was out Christmas shopping with a friend). Sigh... too many memories. So, I agree... if this is the situation you are in - don't wait 30years. I've not only a mother to Storm but a mother, maid, cook & then some - to Norm too.
I didn't make this up, didn't share to humiliate Norm - they do it to themselves when they behave the way they do, they don't need help from us being thoughtless & careless. They are not stupid - they choose to be ignorant. & some children lose their lives because they are not looked after properly. I shared so some might learn before they waste 30+ years of their lives, trying to be the perfect wives and mothers'... stop fooling yourself, it doesn't GET BETTER (perhaps in a few rare cases) & it sure as heck doesn't end once the little ones are no longer toddlers.
When you become a mom - it changes everything from your body, brain, hormones, mindset and LIFE - every aspect. Changed Forever. If you're doing it alone - do it alone - one less 'baby' to look after.
Set clear boundaries before you have children... it might' help.
* Baby Oragel... do not use it for teething, I'm not even sure if it is still on the market TBH but the ER Dr. told me it should be banned! I could have been much worse, pretty much - Storm overdosed & was slipping into a oragel coma, it is very dangerous and we never used it again & I warned everyone who would listen. Just like Baby Powder - now proven to promote cancer, KNOW what you are giving your children, don't rely on the government or product producers to tell you the truth, they don't.
I understand why this movie is 'being talked about' - about time too.
Next more powerful women.. this time from the bible.
The other night I stumbled on the movie NightBitch, I knew nothing about it but saw the cover & I like Amy Adams, a woman and dogs- how bad can it be? It was bad, in the sense - it hit a nerve and had me remembering & angry, still. I highly recommend it to men & women before you have kids and especially after. I don't want to spoil it for anyone not seen it yet but it's about a mom with a baby, toddler and life at this time and it is spot on, too accurate for comfort for too many, no doubts. Why do you think they made the movie - it is a common occurrence, too many can relate to.
Before I continue I want to stress, Storm was the best gift ever given by God & I am grateful for him... but because of Norm, there are too many memories I would rather of not had/have. This movie shows how difficult it is, how much women GIVE and how little we get in return, how little appreciation or consideration. Perhaps long ago it took a village to raise a child but the village is gone & most women, like it or not raise the children on their own - with a husband.
I'm going to share a few 'memories'... I am often accused of living in the past - by someone who wishes I would forget the past - I guess so... but I've learned, when we forget or don't acknowledge the past it tends to repeat itself & child rearing is no different. Storm was an 'emergency breech C-section' (up and down incision), when I came home from having him, two weeks passed and I had to drive myself to emergency because my C- section had opened to a gaping hole 2 inches big- the ER Dr., was angry and stressed - "YOU are doing too much!" I was told to go home and tell my husband to 'step up!'. Norm was not cooking, cleaning or anything - it was if his life never changed at all.
Not long after , I guess Storm was a few months - I was exhausted and needed a break - Norm took Storm for the day to the mall with friends. I packed up all he needed and off they went. When they returned - 6 hours later, Storm was acting strange... I looked through the bag and everything I had sent - food, drink, snacks - NOT one thing had been touched! Norm though had purchased and ate lunch with our friends. Storm on the other hand was starving, wet and exhausted. I was furious! My friend Kathy (& neighbour) that went to the mall with her baby & husband (born days apart from Storm) was so upset, she cried and apologized - she assumed Norm was feeding him. How fucked up is that? How selfish to not give your baby any consideration to feed or change him for 7 hours? So, I never let him take Storm again (until he could speak), go figure.
The first time Norm was asked to look after Storm for the day - he was resentful - "why not get a baby sitter?" God forbid he look after his own child for the day & I even made it easy, food, toys, suggestions were provided. I headed down to the city to my cousins baby shower. Storm was not yet 2.. I think he was about 14 months (still not speaking). When I arrived back home - Storm was in bed (his crib) and I thought that was a bit strange as he was normally active at that time- I went up to see him and he was unresponsive! Usually, he was thrilled to see him momma! He was like a rag doll - literally, I started to freak out, I could not even shake him awake! Norm was still outside playing ball hockey'.. I screamed and asked him what is wrong with Storm - "He was sleepy, I put him down.." it was then I saw the open & empty tube of *'Baby Oragel'.. I asked him about it and he said he had it but he took it off of him & that was that. I called 911 and they said get him to the hospital A.S.A.P. - OFF I went (by myself) I wasn't waiting for an ambulance - Storm was rushed in, still unresponsive and had his stomach pumped -right away, It was difficult to watch (a painful memory) I was in the room & shoved a tube down his nose and pumped charcoal into him. Hours later we returned home and Norm was still playing ball hockey, he did not even come and see how Storm was - I called him over and slapped him so hard in the face, his glasses flew off. So, I never let him 'baby sit' again.
It never ends.. One day I asked him for help so I could fold the growing mountain of laundry which Norm was incapable of doing, he begrudgingly took Storm and said: "Come on Storm, Mommy doesn't love you anymore!!" Those words still burn my ears to this day - simply because, I had asked for some help.
I did it. I taught Storm everything - Norm did NOTHING. I taught him how to speak (which was delayed due to hearing loss) Norm was too impatient. I took him everywhere, I raised Storm by myself. Fact. There's more.. so much more but - what's the point of rehashing everything, & there's too much to mention & yes it still and always will make my blood boil.
When Storm was around 14 our fridge broke, Storm and Norm were looking on-line for a new one and I made the mistake of piping in - "I like that one!" Norm turned and gave me a disgusted look (in front of Storm ) and said:
" You have no say, you have contributed nothing to this marriage."
I kid you not. That is what he thought of me after almost 2 decades. I contributed nothing to the marriage. Because I was not bringing home a pay check - I contributed nothing - WOW. Has he lived that one down? NEVER. Why should I forget? I wish, I was like the mom in the movie and had the strength to leave him then because you know what... unlike the movies ending when the child is still a little toddler, it continues. 3 decades + later- Norm still has '0 appreciation for me. Looking back, I did him a favour, unable to trust him alone with our child, I was forced to do it all on my own- I would never have any fun anyway, if I left Norm with Storm - I always terrified of what might happen in his own fathers "care". Like the time Storm broke his wrist and Norm did not believe him & would not take him to the ER, Storm had to call me to come home (I was out Christmas shopping with a friend). Sigh... too many memories. So, I agree... if this is the situation you are in - don't wait 30years. I've not only a mother to Storm but a mother, maid, cook & then some - to Norm too.
I didn't make this up, didn't share to humiliate Norm - they do it to themselves when they behave the way they do, they don't need help from us being thoughtless & careless. They are not stupid - they choose to be ignorant. & some children lose their lives because they are not looked after properly. I shared so some might learn before they waste 30+ years of their lives, trying to be the perfect wives and mothers'... stop fooling yourself, it doesn't GET BETTER (perhaps in a few rare cases) & it sure as heck doesn't end once the little ones are no longer toddlers.
When you become a mom - it changes everything from your body, brain, hormones, mindset and LIFE - every aspect. Changed Forever. If you're doing it alone - do it alone - one less 'baby' to look after.
Set clear boundaries before you have children... it might' help.
* Baby Oragel... do not use it for teething, I'm not even sure if it is still on the market TBH but the ER Dr. told me it should be banned! I could have been much worse, pretty much - Storm overdosed & was slipping into a oragel coma, it is very dangerous and we never used it again & I warned everyone who would listen. Just like Baby Powder - now proven to promote cancer, KNOW what you are giving your children, don't rely on the government or product producers to tell you the truth, they don't.
I understand why this movie is 'being talked about' - about time too.
Next more powerful women.. this time from the bible.
