Inspired by original illustrations. Winnie the Pooh. A.A. Milne
Piglet~ "How do you spell Love?"
Pooh~. "You don't spell it, you feel it.
This blog & painting have been 'Poppy approved'.
Pooh & Piglet camp fire . 8 x 8 gouache on watercolour
Inspired by original illustrations. Winnie the Pooh. A.A. Milne Piglet~ "How do you spell Love?" Pooh~. "You don't spell it, you feel it. This blog & painting have been 'Poppy approved'.
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The day I moved in, I pulled into the driveway (truck piled high with boxes & my snail Garry) a beautiful summer day - I stepped out of my truck and immediately had a Luna month land on me - *on the rosary I was wearing & stayed there!!
I sowed my friend Geoffrey, who followed me in his vehicle - exclaiming excitedly: Look! An official forest greeting! It stayed there until, I gently removed it and placed it on some flowers, as I was excited to unpack. At the time, I didn't even know it was a Luna Moth -or how rare a sighting actually is - let alone one landing on me. Looking at how beat up it was, it is a blessing it even made it -they only live 10 days. 10 days for such a beautiful creature who doesn't have a mouth -it is simply here at this point to be admired and reproduce. When I googled Luna Moth -Google shows: Luna moth landing on you meaning... of course I looked. It's rare to see one flying but especially rare to have one actually land on you - if so it's said to represents good luck, I certainly felt lucky watching it hanging on to my rosary. Transformation, change & a reminder to enjoy life as it is short. This I am aware, especially the past few years. It is also suggests, if one 'lands on you, you actually have the potential to find your soulmate. I think it must be Arrow - lol. Since moving here, I seem to attract butterflies, dragonflies - to the point I joked; stating my new forest name is Butterfly Branch'. I have countless images and video with them on me. I can't put into words how fantastic it feels to have a free, tiny, intelligent creature of God, grace me with their presence. I've learned to welcome them all and am not afraid of a bee or wasp lands on me, I understand they are exploring - just like we do & they won't harm, unless threatened -just like us. The snow (a few inches the past few days) has me speculating spring - it won't be long. Soon we'll be out exploring the woods, currently though - I'm exploring botanical painting in watercolour & gouache. I'm going to try some more moths and bugs and branches, trees & leaves are limited but it's pine with me.. heehee Signs, how many times do we get signs and dismiss them as - oh - it's just a moth landing on me? Nope - That moth graced me with it's presence as it was dying & I'm forever grateful, welcoming me with a sign' like no other, as I arrived at my new home ready for new adventure. My prayer today is: Thank you. Plans in the Bible.
Occasionally, the Bible mentions specific plants which intrigues me, of all the plants in the plant kingdom - why are certain ones mentioned ? Mandrake is one of the first plants - mentioned in Genesis 13:14, other than 'we start in a Garden. Clearly plants are significant. Mandrake was highly regarded, when one woman asked for it & offered her husband for sex in exchange. It is suggested to help women conceive. I looked into Mandrake & it’s interesting history. Mandrake has been used throughout history since- bible times. :) It was believe the plant screamed when pulled from the grounds (as we witness in Harry Potter) so people use to tie a rope to it’s roots & the other end to a dog - who pulled the roots out & did ‘not die’( thankfully) - which was anticipated. It’s a plant that does have many medicinal uses -but be warned it’s one that can heal or poison depending on the amount - Plants teach us life or death lessons all the time. I do not recommend you play around with any plant or mushroom, unless you absolutely KNOW what you are doing, to avoid deadly consequences. It often looks like a tiny human with big roots that resemble a body & legs -this is how it got it’s name Mandrake. I read (can't remember where-sorry) when Mandrake grew under the gallows it became more powerful by the sperm that fell from the victim during his hanging. yuk & yikes. There are a few plants mentioned, some with specific instruction which leaves me wondering why some appear to be preferred over others. I noticed a friend on IG posting a negative comment about the bible & God, it amused me - I’m pretty sure ’ this person has never read the bible. The bible phrase came to mind: Pearls before swine… there is no point even discussing with some - especially a person who knocks a book, they have not even read, any book. If you want to have an educated conversation/debate on any topic/book - at least understand what you are speaking of. It didn’t upset me - perhaps in the sense that I think - IF he read the bible, he might feel better about somethings & understand - the bible is about LOVE. It upset me more, him disregarding God, I know for a fact this human had at one point - several people praying to God - for him... so he is disrespecting God & everyone else who prayed/prays for him. Anyhow, I am not judging, I like this human.. I've felt a bond - created by God - to him for a long time.. if anything, I'll pray he discovers what I have - unconditional love. My life is better because of my relationship with God. Thank God! It’s been no ‘piece of cake’… even reading this blog -you will read & understand my journey with the bible has indeed progressed. The more I learned, the more I’ve read - including the history of the bible- (very interesting) has convinced me of The Word of God. Don’t knock it until you try it! ;). This cute little guy was sure enjoyable to paint, smiling back at me. I wonder what bible plant I'll paint next. In Gods garden there is no such thing as a WEED’. The Happy Hippie 2010. One of my earliest cartoons to help with cannabis education.
Seems like yesterday. When I read how addiction often starts with an injury or pain & how brutal overdoses from opiates are right now, in some places - more died from suicide the past few years, than covid. I think back to a conversation with Sick Kids, suggesting I put my son on liquid codeine & morphine for pain management - but warned, he'd probably have organ failure after a few years, AS well as all the side effects.. Because of cannabis - other substances more harmful were avoided. Cannabis is still not an easily obtainable option for sick children, it should be. It's a very difficult time for parents with sick children, it's such an emotional heart wrenching journey. I don't tell anyone 'what' to do.. I know they are already dealing with enough and often confused, as well as afraid something will happen to their child. When ever a parent reached out to me, I tried to assist by sharing our experience. Everyone has to make their own choices - as they will be the ones living with their decisions. Seems like yesterday. I must say, I enjoyed all the cartoons that were inspired by cannabis & the adventure. Many were sold & some gifted but I still have quite a collection of Happy Hippie in bins. I see them and can hardly believe myself, I created all those! Perseverance. Happy to continue the journey, still painting & educating. Create to create. Awww Bugs. Gouache on black 8.5 x 11. Saturday Morning Inspiration on Sunday.
Bugs bunny contemplating the Universe, tearing up with Awe. Bugs is not sad - he is overwhelmed with Awe & Love for the Creator! Chuck Jones - hahaha Just kidding... God created everything. Including Chuck. I read the only time one is to express 'Awe' is in the presence or awareness of God. All, can be fantastic, amazing, incredible - but only God is Awesome. I feel this way sometimes - looking at the sky, leaves, forest, flowers, creatures- amazed & in Awe. Awe of awareness of all Gods beauty & overwhelmed with LOVE, I too tear up & give thanks. I'll leave with this Awesome quote: See the love of God in you, and you will see it everywhere because it IS everywhere. How sweet it is to be loved by you, starts to play, as I post about the 'power of Love'. Pondering the power of love. Gouache on black 8.5 x 10 We all teach & teach all the time.. Are you planting seeds of Love or Hate? How sweet it is, to get a letter thanking me for 'teaching by example' , from a friend who just exploring paints. She is also brave enough to explore black paper - yeehaw! It's exciting being creative! Happy to be in service. I've been pondering love lately, specifically Gods Love, absolutely perfect love. A reminder as well - all other love, too - is Gods will. It will or it won't. No point stressing over anything, that God has planned. It's all good because - it's all God. Focus on the Power of Love Love yourself, as you would love others. Do what you love. It's Mental Health Monday - food is life - Let FOOD be thy Medicine! Feel Good Food.
Cooking can be soothing & relaxing & when you cook and feed yourself or friends or family you are serving' love on a plate. When I care for someone, I naturally want to feed them, comfort & heal - when possible. Want to kn0w the positive side of a tooth ache? I lost 10lbs! lol All those Christmas goodies, chocolates, homemade mini cheesecakes (Oh my) & meals with all the fixings! COWabunga - now January and bring on the comfort food! Recently, I tried a post on PIN - 'easy chicken' & another I saw on instagram. On PIN, I as searching for slow cooker recipes -I came across one that sounded way too simple- yet, had many rave reviews so I tried it& it is delicious - VERY easy, affordable & goes a long way.. 1.Get out your slow cooker - add 3 chicken breast (not bone or skin), -sprinkle (on top of the chicken) - taco seasoning -I prefer hot & spicy. -Cover it with a jar of your favourite salsa and cook on high, for 5 hours. When it's done, shred the chicken and it's ready to enjoy Add it to a wrap with rice, black beans, grated cheddar, greens - or just put it in a bowl with some added tasty sides- what ever you prefer. It doesn't get much easier. The above recipe, I saw on Instagram & thought: Drool* - they look good. We tried and (all raved) - I don't think I'll cook potatoes any other way, better than scalloped, mashed or fried & fantastic the next day as hash browns fried up with a duck egg for breakfast. - MmmmmmmMmmph! I'll admit - Storm does the work' like cutting, chopping, slicing & dicing - making all an easy task for me, to throw together. The flavours on the bottom of the pan cook up into the scored potatoes, saturating them with tasty goodness! Storm is also a fantastic cook, getting better with experience. 3 adults live here, 3 adults take turns preparing meals & I rarely do dishes, I did my share, of meals & of dishes - for about 25 years (just me) they can take turns, now. ;) When I have friends/family who tell me, their adult kids (or husbands) don't cook - I think they are foolish & tell them so... I have even suggested - "make them help out & contribute, or ask them to move out. We don't HELP our kids by doing everything for them, Storm also does all laundry & has since I had surgery. As humans on this life journey, no one rides for free - Cash, Grass or Ass - a popular expression for a reason. We are ALL here to serve. When you teach your children to cook, you teach them how to nourish & comfort & care for themselves- and others. It's that time of the year, noticeably more people are feeling blue (fact), so give yourself some comfort food, show yourself some LOVE. Everything in moderation you don't want to pack on too many hibernation pounds. I hope if you try, these recipes make your life a little easier & tastier. Don't blame if if you overindulge leading to a bulge'... hee hee hee Tonight it's pirogies, bacon, onion & cheddar cheese! Prayer before a meal: Thank you Lord, for the food before us & the love between us. Amen. Gouache on watercolour 8 x 8.
There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind. Amen. Created to create. Happy New Year! Hang in there! gouache on watercolour 6 x 6
When I was a kid I had a poster, (many had it- I think it was one of the 'first' to take off) it was a kitten hanging on a rope that stated: Hang In There. This is my sentiment going into 2023... Stay positive, creative & focus on what you want I read a quote that I want to start my year with: See the Love of God in you, and you will see it everywhere because it is everywhere. Got goals for 2023? I do - be a better human, become a better artist and to love & be loved. That is why we are here. Created to Create & Teach Only Love - as, that is what we are. Heading into 2023... Pooh & Piglet gouache on watercolour 6x6
If you look closely you will notice I changed it to Fuck it - instead of Fuck Trudeau. Trudeau will fuck himself, at this rate. I'm listening to a podcast (Jordan Peterson) on how many times Trudeau used his power (against Canadians) for no other reason, except to advance his power. Politics that prevented Canadians from travel, work, visiting family - we were told it was science & it has been PROVEN it was JUST political - no science. Name calling, encouraging hatred & divide amongst Canadians -blatant lies. Many forced to take a vaccine (or lose their job) , a vaccine that would PREVENT the transfer/transmission of covid from human to human & we all know how that went. & if you don't... it didn't. How can Canadians trust Trudeau at this point? Boy oh boy, was this an 'eye opener' & I am thankful for the lesson - no more 'idols', go within, trust God. This is all part of the lesson, we are to learn. IF God, gave us all 'choice' - who is anyone, to take it from us? I know, am not alone. Watching Trudeaus recent interview where they show him & the crowds when first running for PM & the Now. People throwing kisses & hearts to rocks & Fuck Trudeau posters. I understand & agree with the protesters - Oh wait.. Trudeau sets off the Emergency act (which he still defends) on our peaceful protestors but states, he agrees with and encourages China protests. At this point, I don't even know... will it be a 'Better the devil you know situation? I don't know. I don't hate Trudeau, I am disappointed in myself for putting so much faith in him, yet thankful for his service & the lessons. The best lesson we all must learn: WE THE PEOPLE. I don't agree with the rocks or violence by the way (I do understand the anger) but there is some sacrifice that comes with this "job", added stress, complete loss of privacy, on behalf of his family as well. Not one of us is perfect - Jesus asking who wants to throw the first rock? Who is without sin? Yee Haw! Bring in 2023! I plan on thanking God for every single day, all day - every day! 'Here we are , days away from 2023 and I am reflecting as many do on the past year, which was difficult for a few reasons.
Friends who died these past couple of years are on my mind, I am wondering why they died. Could it have been avoided? I've been feeling 'powerless' - how about you? All the news, war (war of famine), covid, recession, food supply, global warming, China, conspiracy theories proven 'True tales. No wonder we are feeling powerless - the great divide is upon us, people are forgetting the golden rule: Love Thy neighbour. God's not forgot. I picked up my ACIM to read & was reminded of my Power - (OUR power) LOVE. Love is our power. Trudeau just told Canadians next year is going to be difficult.. No shit Sherlock. He is partly responsible for it' as he continues to push for certain things... you know, things in particular - NO ONE wants to talk about. The ONE time $500. rent top up for lower income - WTF is that going to do for all struggling with the average rent in Toronto being $2,400, on top of the price GOUGING going on by all these big grocery chains?! Stores NOW being investigated. The CIA killed JFK you don't say.. what conspiracy theory is going be exposed as TRUE today? The FDA now warning of heart issues indubitably related to the vaccine: Pfizer-BioNTech COVID-19 Vaccine EUA LOA reissued ... - FDAhttps://www.fda.gov › media › download. PDF Dec 8, 2022 — Vaccine (Vaccination Providers) was revised to include a Warning about myocarditis and pericarditis following. The FDA is advising vaccine recipients to seek immediate medical attention if they experience “chest pain, shortness of breath, or feelings of having a fast-beating, fluttering, or pounding heart after vaccination.” From this point, it astounds me how anyone would even consider giving this to their children until more studies have been done, or continues to choose' to take them at all. ALSO proven, not helpful to stop spreading covid. But remember - "You were never forced - it was always your choice" -according to Trudeau. For all the tried to warn others of these issues, being able to say "I told you so" is not gratifying to anyone. I've read of several class action lawsuits starting - all around the world. I'll pray for their success. Look into it yourself, start with Florida passing new laws to expose & make' vaccine producers liable... for causing harm. Choose to educate yourself- your life may depend on it. Have you ever read a book & thought after you read it: Holy Fuck. I have, 2 in particular recently: The Myth of Normal by Gabor Mate . M.D. (Canadian). Trauma, Illness & Healing in a Toxic Culture. Ouch, a word I ponder a few times as I read. I have to take breaks from reading it to mull over what was written, it explains a great deal, why we humans do what we do, addiction, pain, abuse.. As difficult as it is- if more people read this book & understood why & what, we are all doing to each other, there might be hope. I'd encourage parents in particular of young children, infants - to read for some possible insight. Children need all the help they can get, especially IF the conspiracy theories about children in particular are true. Recent advertising campaigns & well publicized court cases (Jeffrey E & Co) are just two example how we are failing kids. We fail by buying into this illusion. Even movies... something has changed in my mind and I don't want to contribute to the mass madness of "Movies" (most movies) any longer. I'll take book anyway before I watch any movie or 'movie star', who later is exposed as some abusive predator, who used their power to hurt & lie... too many exposed recently to mention. Harvey. I have also been reading (& must put down from time to time because my mind gets overwhelmed) The New English Bible The Apocrypha. If you read this blog from the start - you'll see my journey with the bible. It's become more serious with passing time. My appreciation & love for God & Jesus, also increasingly more important to me. I get why people become fearful & fear God. I am not afraid... if anything, I find it (although not pleasant) enlightening. If someone is already stressed with prophecies, end of days... maybe you should pass & not read this.. word of God. 2022 we lost Bow & Scruffy & Fluffy died... just mentioning them makes me tear up. 2023 I will focus on my Power - Love. We are all connected. I feel drawn in a new direction in 2023. Inward. Ending on a positive note - I saw on instagram, for people who have dogs that like to chew- give them a cabbage!!! When giving it to the dogs, Daisy(our toy destroyer) I said "WOW- Look at this fancy ball!" Both Arrow & Daisy wanted it & both have chewed on this cabbage for days. They don't eat it all, just some but they really enjoyed it, it will be a routine gift- cheaper & healthier & safer- than bones all the time. & no, I've not noticed any stinky farts because of it. Merry Christmas!!
Well - Ho Ho Ho! I was up at 3 to pee & made the mistake of turning on the outside light- Holy SNOW! I have not seen this much snow for a while. I was so excited I lit the fire & made coffee & laugh every time I let the dogs out, the little ones would not be seen if we threw them in the snow - no. Our Christmas travel plans won’t be happing today.. it will take a while to dig out- let alone drive a few hours & it’s still snowing. It’s the first day in weeks, I’ve felt good enough to even want breakfast, that tooth ache has had me in bed a few days & I’ve lost a few pounds… difficult when surrounded by holiday treats! Merry Christmas! Happy Birthday Jesus - the ultimate gift from God. Immanuel! God with us. I celebrate Jesus daily as it makes me happiest! When I ponder Gods Glory, I feel most at Peace. Today, I celebrate gifts in my life - friends (near & far), family & furry family! Thankful for a home, food, heat -9 currently…. Snow shovels… heehee. I’ve much to be grateful for. There are a few I’d like to ‘celebrate with’ but it’s just not possible - that’s o.k. .. goals for 2023 - I’ve got them! I just opened my blinds and laughed out loud- the snow is 1/2 up, not much of a view - great day to paint & imagine ‘all the possibilities ahead.. once we dig out. Merry Christams! Stay warm & safe. Below, some photos of this mornings discovery! Tribute to Chuck, as I thought of him while painting. Count the different facial expressions the Grinch makes, each one so very clear to the emotion we are encouraged to imagine. One second you can see the anger & frustration as The Grinch struggles with the sled, his heart growing... to the look of Absolute & Obvious LOVE when understanding - finally kicks in.
Animators are taught to look into the mirror to master facial expressions, when Dr. Seuss confronted Chuck on why the Grinch looked like Chuck, Chuck Jones shrugged and replied..."it happens". It does. Look at the look an Max as he sits, pondering positive thoughts & images. The Grinch, you can imagine the next word out his mouth & it's not FFFfffestive. These will be the extent of my Christmas decorating. It was cold this morning, I was a wee bit Grinch an it's snowing. Another beautiful day to read my current, incredibly thought provoking book & possibly paint. The power of visuals is so important to children in particular, in the Grinch it's a sad second (some might not catch) as the Grinch is complaining & grabbed Max by the Scruff of his neck, the grinch stands there with his fist at Max's very sad little face, only for a second, the message is too clear. Wow, imagine those two, creating together - well, the results are evident. How do small toddlers feel when they see violent images, how did I feel watching Daffy blow his beak off? I think there's a bit of a difference between then & now. Images of Abused children, duck taped to chairs, on bags & in magazines, on coffee tables... they do see them, their tiny brain must be wondering... wtf? Many videos with filters using toddlers are on social media. Toddlers, most just able to walk & grasp 'life', just learning about EVERYTHING from food taste & testers to touch -fur, soft, scratchy, hot! No wonder they sleep so much - every day is tiny new brain overload. Imagine it - learning everything for the very first time. These filters are disturbing to most, let alone babies. The first 5 years very informative and important for a healthy life to follow. We manage all the information as we get older because we understand 'oh - I know that is only 'make believe', I understand how movies are made. Toddlers have no frigging clue how movies are "made" let alone Instagram filters', then some adult shows them a filter that has a giant fucking tarantula 'crawling, amazingly, realistically out of her nose! That is child abuse. That poor babies expression as she started to slap her own face - was FUCKED UP. How is that funny? This technology is so new and fascinating, look at that 1 example - that person has inflicted a frightening experience of visual trauma to that child. I've seen a couple now and thought "that's cute".. but after noticing all toddlers seem to think that what they are seeing, IS actually on their face, is confusing tiny minds. I think it should be law that children should not have their images online, until after an age where they understand it & these filters are messing up tiny minds. Parents need to refrain. That's just my opinion, I certainly have not forgotten that baby's face & hitting itself screaming, not laughing. At what expense is this 'amusement' going to cost children? Even the 'cute' stuff is concerning. Peace of mind, is priceless. Visuals - once seen can not be unseen. See that look on Max, that's how I feel - Loved & loving. God Loves me, you too. Loved & Loving.. how each of us has been created. Forgiven & Forgiving. My morning warm up... the best Christmas special. A Charlie Brown Christmas. gouache on black.
What is the meaning of Christmas? Linus explains it's the birth of our King - Jesus Christ. This image is when Charlie Brown stops and looks up to God & is grateful... then, everything changes. Thank God. When creating this special, network producers told Charles Schultz to get rid of the scene with Linus speaking of God & Jesus & he said: NO. They use it all, or no Christmas Special. It is my favourite animated Christmas Special, next would be the classic Grinch... Tis the Season Next.. My 'frisky' gingerbread. Bible thoughts…
After reading about Balenciagas advertising tactic bullshit & child trafficking… child abuse - I felt sick to my stomach. Kids right now, don’t get to be… kids. Fucking using Elmo & Pokaroo to push drugs’ - vaccines are drugs. Reading about ‘Drag’ to toddlers, just learning about life, I’ve seen drag queens on social media explain how preposterous this is - never mind confusing to tiny developing minds who don’t even know how to use the potty & yet, we expect them to understand drag??? Using children in hurtful, harmful, derogatory ‘advertising’ images for adult consumerism & consumption is evil. Visuals - designed to encourage harm towards children & make such sights ‘normal’ is fucked up. Those who go along with it all - with each purchase made.. it’s your choice. All who think this is o.k., perhaps you have not read the bible & - or… perhaps you don’t care. I won’t judge… but Jesus does. I’m the first to promote ‘the bible is all about LOVE & forgiveness & how to BE - better humans. Make no mistake - it’s also full of lessons of love gone wrong, lies, plotting, murder & evil. There are also several things specifically, the bible makes very clear are wrong & repeats - just for good measure. When I become infuriated, worried, depressed reading about these atrocities - I remind myself: Let go & let God. The bible makes it clear what happens to those who hurt children. Actually, it leaves it to the imagination when we are told: But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea. It were better for him.. in other words, they have no idea of the hell that awaits. It’s mentioned a few times. Matthew, Luke & Mark all mention the same. As these companies are exposed, we all have the opportunity to educate & eliminate… eliminate by not purchasing. We don’t get to make the laws or ‘punish’ those who break them but time & time again, we have all witnessed how a business can go under due to public awareness and opinion. So many distractions right now… sure it’s easier to put up decorations an pretend all is merry & gay, but in a few weeks we put it all back in the box in 2023. We shall continue on .. sadly, so will child trafficking and more bullshit like Balenciaga - unless people choose stop supporting them & continue exposing them. You better watch out, you better not cry - I’m telling you why… Jesus Christ is coming to town. Not like humans have not been warned by the most popular book on the planet, since - In the beginning. Green Sloth - acrylic on board. I am affected only by my thoughts.
Therefore, I AM thinking Happy thoughts. A green sloth to remind me to focus on LOVE & give thanks to God. Not sure what's going on with his eyes but it makes me smile, seeing his sweet imperfections, yet he's so serious with his message of LOVE. Show yourself some love & kindness & Thank God, for another day to do so! Raccoon Watercolour & gouache on water colour paper.
I'm surrounded by fur, on my desk & at my feet. My studio is tiny yet, it seems to be the place I & 4 dogs always want to hangout, all staring out he window. Other than the times when am tripping over them, I'm o.k. with my girls wanting to be with me. It's that time of year I feel for them, the weather is cold & they don't go out but long to. We still manage to kick the ball a few minutes every day & have taken to playing inside a bit more. I explain to the girls "some dogs live in apartments & never get out like you do - so don't try to make me feel guilty." You know... I prayed for Trudeau. I remember feeling such relief when he took over Harpers position, so no... I don't hate him or wish anything bad to come to him. Everyone is here to teach us lessons & boy oh boy - WTF does Justin Trudeau think by lying on the stand for the world to witness? After WE ALL (anyone with TV, a newspaper & social media) KNOW is that not long ago he was calling the unvaccinated names, to which he just denied on the stand... I also read, which was truly comical, in his defence for calling the emergency act (which many also agree should not have been called or was NOT needed) suggest "what if a grandmother got run over by a truck during the protest??" Really Justin? What IF a grandmother on a scooter got run over by a fucking horse!??? I guess that doesn't count. The entire world now knows he is a world leading liar. A liar that did indeed cause divide & shame some Canadians, who do not agree with his totalitarian ways & he is responsible for adding a huge amount of grief & stress for countless Canadians. If he can lie about this - in front of the world, what else is he capable of? Do I wish him harm, never. Do I wish him gone as our PM, I guess - to be replaced by who? Frankly, my trust - because of the hope I had with Trudeau, is gone. I don't trust any politician. Covid has been the biggest 'power trip' on the planet to date. Look at China - the moment people protest, restrictions are lifted- it's all gone away? It's all a test. Not a day goes by where some politician states 'everyone must behave a specific way' & they behave the opposite... & then our noses are rubbed in it. So yes, I prayed for Trudeau & still do.. I was blind but now I see. I've prayed for many & I AM thankful for all lessons. Thank you. Thankfully I've had many lessons in love as well, to keep me hoping & keep praying. I am grateful for the lesson & reminder, to only ever, put all my faith in God. Darkness sets in - dark at 5 p.m., looking out the studio windows I see nothing but my reflection - which can be somewhat distracting, especially as I am use to watching birds & the light dance through the trees. Even though dark, I've been focusing on light - painting it, being inspired by it. Thankfully there are several very talented beings who share their painting gift on YouTube and teach how to paint light, I don't like 'masking fluid' so it's slightly more difficult with watercolour & gouache to achieve the results Im hoping for- I think I'll try with acrylic.
This has been an emotional week, much pondering.. It's been almost 10 years since surgery & I look back in amazement & give thanks. I remember not being able to eat a meal without difficulty - I've worked past it, not being able to have a conversation or laugh with out face contortion & pain, I've persevered through it. Chronic pain, I have learned to live with it & there are more times than not- I hardly notice anymore. Frankly, I've gone from thinking about death, vivid memories still, after surgery- realizing - it was not successful & just wanting to give up; now celebrating every day with new admiration, love, respect & continued heightened faith. I've been reading about MAID in Canada & the changes it's going through. I agree with MAID & assisted death for those suffering from terminal illness & devastating pain who are able to choose when they can no longer go on. BUT... Now, those mentally suffering with depression can opt to choose MAID to end their lives. People who can't afford housing & are struggling with financial issues like bills, food, clothing.. choosing to die than to continue to try... leaves me feeling we are failing each other. I read about people who prescription drugs don't work (only exaggerate symptoms - as they did with me). Enough with forcing people to take drugs that are harming them (mentally & physically), I wonder is everyone who applies to MAID educated on the new advancements becoming common knowledge with psilocybin for depression? How about LSD changing peoples experience & mind.... don't you think we should allow people to try all they can before they choose to end their lives? I do. How can we have so many vacant properties & so many homeless. Why can humans create what we do, go up into space, make meat in a lab, make bionic body parts, make 'movies' that cost 100 of millions to entertain the masses BUT we can't look after each other? We can't see that each other is safe, warm & fed? I've had it with out 'world leaders', jet setting all over, having a grand time being hypocrites. We can't make Tylenol for our kids, can't home our homeless? Yet we can send millions to other countries, something is messed up with what's happening here in Canada. Depression, pain, suffering is all a part of the adventure. I told Storm just a couple of weeks ago - I am grateful for this brain tumour - nothing has taught me more & as quickly as something that has you pondering your life every day, literally. It's helped me decipher what (&who) to tolerate & what to let go. I think had MAID ben available for depression about 10 years ago - I'm not sure I'd be here. Today, I appreciate it all & everyone. I focus on living & enjoying. I thank God every morning & continue all day - not for God, for me. I thank God for simply being able to kick the ball with my dogs & paint. I usually yell it out loud at least once a day: Thank YOU Lord! lol. The chickadees like it, I know. I don't know what to tell anyone who is depressed & considering MAID to end their lives - other than: I have been there, with hope & faith in God you can get through it. I know it sounds simple and easy for me sitting here, in the woods with a nice fire & not much to stress over.. but I have not always been here. God put me here, I'm so grateful it brings me to tears when I think about the past couple of years. Not long ago I could not eat, smile, speak, walk or even read without pain, we were in serious debt and weeks from losing our home, but I listened to God & never lost faith. I still giggle, when my real- estate agent called & told me 'I better lower my price & sell!' & I said: God told me to be patient - I suggest you do the same! & then hung up on her. The next day she called me - shocked with an terrific offer. God still has plans for me & I'm fucking thrilled to be here & let God continue to amaze me, every day. Time to paint & continue to focus on LIGHT.. some samples of what I've been playing with below. |